Our Retirement Adventures

What We've Been Doing

In May 2021, David began working part-time at the neighborhood recreation center as a weight room attendant. It has been a great thing: he gets to work out for free, interact with other people, and make some money.

His moods have been reasonably stable as he continues to take his meds, visits with his doctor, and talks to me about his feelings. Working at the Rec Center is a major help for him; we feel grateful!

On occasion I have been writing blog posts for Familysearch. I enjoy working on different assignments learning about interesting subjects as well as earning a small amount of money.

I have also been spending time in the mornings taking some friends to an English class (so happy I can do that for them and watch them progress with speaking English!), go to the pool for a water aerobic class, a Tai Chi class (I enjoy the exercise and the socializing with friends), and a memoir writing class at the senior center (very helpful in keeping me motivated to write and fun to visit and listen to stories being told). I also have been playing around with painting classes as well as learning to do some rock painting by myself. I'm certainly no artist, but I'm enjoying it!

First watercolor card

From a pour paint party

Rock painting 

My sister Becky came home from 11 years in Japan, and taught me the Japanese folkart of making temari balls. It was wonderful getting to spend time together and with our Aunt Karren. 

We continue to go camping as often as possible during the warmer months. On one of our camping trips we noticed a number of retired couples out and about in side-by-sides. It looked like so much fun, we decided to get one, too.

Our Side by Side Toy

We bought a 2019 Kawasaki side-by-side in January 2022 that we affectionately call the Toy. We have had a lot of fun taking it out and exploring with it. So far, we have taken it out to the west desert of Utah, the Uintah mountains, and the San Rafael Swell. I do most of the driving because David’s hands cramp up when he drives it for too long. I love driving it! David has to tell me to slow down…

San Rafael Swell, 2023

Little Sahara, 2022. The T-shirts say, "But did you die?!"

Group trek above San Pete County, Utah, 2023

The Toy (West desert of Utah)

A Look Back at 2023

In addition to our camping trips, we spent time working around our house. We upgraded and refreshed both bathrooms, redid the front yard, and have new fences in the backyard. It looks considerably better

B

Update on the Family 

Our family continues to grow and change. We have a new granddaughter, Scarlett, born to youngest son Jeffrey and his wife Nikki! We are thrilled to have her with us. Lara began working for an immigration company and is happy in a new, healthy relationship. Katie and her husband, Andy, bought a new home, and we enjoyed watching their cute 3-year-old Helaina one day a week for most of the year. Brian retired from the Army as a Major! He is happily settled in Las Vegas, Nevada, teaching JROTC for this next phase of his life; we are proud! We enjoyed a visit with him and his family last year. We also spent a joyous few hours with both Ben and Brian and their families during a short visit.

Our oldest grandchildren are also progressing in their own lives. Oldest grandson, Zach, joined the Navy and is stationed in Virginia. Granddaughter Jenna became an airline pilot stationed in Chicago, Illinois. Grandson Ethan saved his money and took a trip to the Philippines on his own. Dylan is engaged, Gabby, Alex, and Alicia are all working and doing well.

Sometimes David and I look at each other and marvel. We have come so far with David’s mental health issues, as a couple, and as a family. We are enjoying this phase of life together.

A Pandemic, Natural Disasters, and Civil Unrest: Oh My!

Charles Dickens' beginning of "A Tale of Two Cities" seems an especially appropriate summary of last year: "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to Heaven, we were all going direct the other way..."
I also liked this quote from Facebook about the year 2020: "2020 is like that year at Hogwarts when Dementors were floating around sucking the joy out of everything and the only protection you had was to stay in the castle, think about happier times, and eat chocolate!" There is a lot of truth to that comment.

In addition to the Pandemic, a 5.7 earthquake hit Salt Lake City in March that added to the level of anxiety and uncertainty. Then, in September, we were hit with hurricane force winds that took down hundreds of trees in our neighborhood. We were sad about the devastation and we were without power for a few days.

Something harder to cope with was the civil unrest that occurred in cities across the nation and around the world.

We noticed that many people focused on prayer and service to other to get through the uncertain times. Others used it as an excuse to lash out at others—including, surprisingly, whether to wear a mask or not, and exhibited the worst of human traits. And, unfortunately, too many in positions of leadership and power carried on with politics as usual. The election season was especially brutal and hard to watch.
Like the rest of the world, we spent the Spring months mostly in isolation because of the Covid-19 pandemic sweeping the world. We missed out on the births of two grandchildren in March (Katie's baby girl, Helaina, and Krista's baby boy, Lincoln.) I had been so excited to be able to have the time to help Katie out, but thanks to Covid, had no chance to do that when the baby was born.
We had two grandchildren graduate from high school this year, Dylan and Gabby! We are so proud of them, and look forward to seeing what they do with their lives. But again, because of the pandemic, they missed the last half of their senior year. Fortunately, in our first family gathering during this time, we were able to be with them during a virtual graduation ceremony.
We also missed being able to see our friends at church and at the recreation center, and being able to come and go as we wished. It was a very sobering time!
However, there have been bright spots, too.
Surviving Isolation
David and I took advantage of the down time to appreciate the quiet, the blessings that we enjoy, our home and each other. When church meetings were canceled for several months, we had our own sweet Sunday services that drew us closer to each other and helped us keep events of the day in perspective.

Happily, the week before everything closed down, future son-in-law Jon, son Jeff, and grandson Zach repaired my bedroom ceiling, and we painted and refinished the floor. I enjoy it so much!

We stayed close to home, but managed to enjoy a few get-aways to the mountains and to the desert. I was able to spend a few days at Flathead Lake Montana with my brother,Mike, sister Barbara, Aunt Karren and my cousin Natalie at Natalie's beautiful lake house.

In addition to working around the house and yard and taking a few trips, I enjoyed writing some blog posts for FamilySearch and transcribed my beloved grandfather's journal from 1912 California. The journal covers first six months of his mission and gave me a different perspective of who my grandfather was as a young man. When I knew him, he had had a distinguished career as an educator and was a force for good in his small Idaho community. Reading about his struggles as a young missionary helped me realize again that we are all works in progress. I enjoyed reading about his day-to-day life and catching a glimpse of a long-vanished time.

A number of years ago I came across something that he wrote to the graduating class of 1952 at the school where he was the superintendent. It still resonates today. He wrote: “Opportunity smacks you in the face! Never before has youth faced a future so loaded with opportunity. Perhaps more has been accomplished economically, socially, and scientifically during the past 100 years than in all preceding time. The splendor of this past period, glorious as it has been, is almost certain to be dwarfed to comparative insignificance along side the prospective progress of the next century. You will participate and share in that progress....

“Your period of life from here out may well be the envy of all preceding generations. The world is almost certainly on the verge of a tremendous burst of heretofore unbelievable progress, wonders, splendors, moral uplift, and spiritual vision. YOU WILL BE IN IT! This is no time for fatalism or pessimism, lethargy or indolence. You are facing a new world, a glorious world, one full of opportunity for yourselves and for service to others. What will be your place in it? It is largely up to you. God speed—A.J. Winters"

When the world gets to be too much, I think of the counsel the Apostle Paul gave to Timothy in 2 Timothy 

when he wrote: "Flee also youthful lusts: but follow righteousness, faith, charity, peace, with them that call on the Lord out of a pure heart.

"But foolish and unlearned questions avoid, knowing that they do gender strifes.

"And the servant of the Lord must not strive; but be gentle unto all men, apt to teach, patient" (2 Timothy 2:22–24, KJV).

I have found peace during personal quiet morning devotionals, walks with David and the dog, and doing small acts of service. I spend more time on social media than I care to admit, but I appreciate being connected to others around the world during this time when we have had to limit in-person contact. I try to limit my time to sites that are uplifting, including nature photography, human interest stories, worldwide prayer groups, and quotes from prophets and apostles. President Russell M. Nelson frequently posts encouragement on social media, including a call to express gratitude. One time he wrote, "Dear friends: The road ahead may be bumpy, but our destination is serene and secure. So, fasten your seatbelt, hang on through the bumps, and do what's right. Your reward will be eternal."

As difficult as 2020 was, I am grateful for the lessons learned.

Update on David: He came through these unsettling times really very well. He has had his usual bouts of depression and anxiety, but it has been manageable. During the last half of the year he experienced a great deal of pain in his shoulder, but was as patient as possible about it as we had to wait 3 months for hospitals to open for non life threatening surgery. That finally happened in March 2021. 

Bonnie, our dog, has been a real blessing and a great companion for David. She loves him so much!

Farewell to Lucy; Hello, Bonnie

We were heartbroken to lose Lucy from cancer at the end of January. How we miss this sweet, happy, loyal dog that we enjoyed and loved for 11 years. See 
https://sallyosmusings.blogspot.com/2011/10/fishing-trip-observation.html for a story about this girl.

Sweet Lucy, on one of our last outings with her

We found her like this one day after she got into the garbage!

When David was in the hospital for his stroke, she sensed something was wrong

Shortly afterward, David felt that he needed a new companion. “Don’t get me wrong,” he said, “I love being with you, but I need a dog, too.” So we went looking. And found this sweet girl at the animal shelter. They had given her the name “Bonnie” and since we couldn’t come up with anything better, Bonnie she is! We sometimes wish we knew what her original name was and what her back story is.

Bonnie is a strong, energetic two-year-old black lab, and we are adjusting to a young dog again. Sweet and well-behaved in the house, she knows all her commands and gives David lots and lots of attention and affection. If he sneezes, she’s right there. If he coughs, she’s right there. If the phone rings, you guessed it; she’s right there. She even lays in the doorway of his bathroom, waiting for him.

Outside, however, is another matter! She gets distracted by squirrels (and birds and butterflies, other dogs, and cars) and loves to run at will, forgetting her name and training.

A couple of examples from the last three months: early on, we took her for a walk to the local park and let her off her leash so she could run for a few minutes. Off she went after a squirrel, and we lost sight of her. We were worried! But there she was, waiting for us at home. Later that day, I saw this post on the neighborhood Facebook page with the following comments:

1. Young black lab dragging blue leash, red tags. Couldn't get my hands on him to look around 12:30 Rosewood Park. 

Said one: Oh man. Labs gonna lab. Hope he finds his humans

And another: tattletale! She was celebrating being a free woman!

And another: Glad she made it home, but boy, does she look happy!

She does love to run! And climb fences, some six feet high! 

Another story: One day she was running lose, chasing a squirrel about 10 feet in front of us, when it ran up a tree. Before we knew it, we could see a black, wagging tail going up the tree trunk! Unfortunately I didn’t have my phone with me, but imagine a 60-pound black lab staring down at us from about 5 to 6 feet up a tree! Hilarious! But then, she discovered she didn’t know how to get down. So David pulled her out of the tree using her leash. We see her stop and look at trees every once in a while and know she’s thinking about climbing up, but then she decides against it and walks away.

The tree Bonnie climbed up; imagine a 60-pound black lab staring down!

We struggle with keeping her in the yard (she jumps the fence with ease), so we have to keep her on a long rope that goes the length and width of the yard. And, on occasion, she darts out of an open door, leading us on a chase up and down the street. Our neighbors have been kind and understanding about her running. And we’ve learned that if we (or our neighbors) open a car door, she’ll jump right in!

In addition to a rope and keeping her on her leash most of the time, we’ve tried a shock collar (failed completely) and now have a choke collar on her that works to keep her under control. 

Please understand: we would really like to let her run free in the yard, but for her safety, as well as for the safety of others, we can’t let her off the rope at this time. We try to remember that she still is a puppy in a lot of ways, and we hope that as she matures, ropes and a choke collar won’t be necessary to keep her safe. We expect to enjoy her for years to come.

I wonder, during this time of social distancing and mask wearing, how often we feel like Bonnie? Yearning to run free without restraint, putting ourselves and others at risk?

I recently came across an address on this subject from 1999 by President James E. Faust, then of the First Presidency of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, that still rings true. The whole talk is worth reading, but here are some important thoughts from it on the subject of obedience.

He said, “Being bridled, or yielding obediently to restraint, is necessary for our personal growth and progression. Recently a nationally broadcast program talked about wild horses that are being tamed by prisoners. As the prisoners formed friendships with the horses, they learn about patience, controlling tempers, respect for others, and the value of working within a system. As they watched the horses learn to be obedient to their commands, they realized how they could have avoided the terrible mistakes that had put them in prison. I add that obedience to righteous principles would have offered them freedom from social diseases, shame, degradation, and feelings of guilt. Like the horses, they could still learn, progress, and achieve.

"We hear many persuasive voices demanding freedom from restrictions, particularly from moral restraints. However, we learn from the history of the earth that any successful society had had boundaries."
And he added, "When obedience becomes our goal, it is no longer an irritation; instead of a stumbling block, it becomes a building block."

We try to keep Bonnie restrained in order to keep her safe from harm so that she can live a long, healthy, happy life. And so it is with us, too. When we learn to be obedient, we can find joy and true freedom to move forward in our lives.

On Rough Waters and Smooth

We had an interesting fall!
Shortly after I wrote last in September, we had a leak in the roof that caused part of my bedroom ceiling to collapse! It turned out that a seal on a pipe leading from the house to the swamp cooler had broken off, causing it to leak. Unfortunately, the insurance company was far less than helpful, and, in fact, added to the stress and frustration.... They said they wouldn't repair the roof because it was caused by wear and tear not covered in the policy. And they were only willing to do a patch job on the ceiling, insisting that they would not remove the old "popcorn" ceiling and that it could be an asbestos problem. In the end it wasn't a problem, but they left me hanging for 3 long days not knowing if we were breathing in poison or not. I told them to close the claim. So not impressed!

We were in the middle of that crisis when we discovered leaking pipes in the kitchen, which meant that we needed to re-pipe the house! The pipes were cast iron and original to the house built in 1955. They definitely needed replacing.
All this happened while I was dealing with the aftermath of a minor concussion caused when I slipped off a stepladder while camping at the end of August!

We were in the middle of getting new pipes in the house (and figuring out how to pay for them) when Katie got married the first weekend of October, and Brittany and her family moved into a beautiful new house.

We took a trip to the Grand Canyon in October for some much needed R&R. It was beautiful and restoring to the soul.

Montezuma Castle, Arizona.

At Snow Canyon, Utah. A graphic reminder that we can grow in adversity

North Rim of the Grand Canyon

Shortly after our trip to the Grand Canyon I came down with an ear (and sinus) infection that caused my eardrum to rupture. That was a new exercise in pain... It turned out the infections were caused by the drug-resistant MRSA bacteria. I'm on the mend, but my hearing is still a little off and probably will be for some time.
Through it all, David was calm and supportive while I fell apart. I used to wonder how he would do if  I were to be incapacitated. The answer: He came through it all with flying colors. I am so grateful!
Can we say we had a stressful season?!
Not all stress is bad. In fact, we need some in our lives. Stress and trials are what can help us grow, learn important lessons, and develop into better people.

One of my favorite quotes on the topic came from President Spencer W. Kimball who knew a lot about trials.

I came across the talk, "Tragedy or Destiny" when I was a young, largely untried college student. It made such an impression on me that I often thought about it during the various struggles of my adult life.
Said he: "If we looked at mortality as the whole of existence, then pain, sorrow, failure, and short life would be calamity. But if we look upon life as an eternal thing stretching far into the pre-mortal past and on into the eternal post-death future, then all happenings may be put in proper perspective.

"Is there not wisdom in his giving us trials that we might rise above them, responsibilities that we might achieve, work to harden our muscles, sorrows to try our souls? Are we not exposed to temptations to test our strength, sickness that we might learn patience, death that we might be immortalized and glorified?
"If all the sick for whom we pray were healed, if all the righteous were protected and the wicked destroyed, the whole program of the Father would be annulled and the basic principle of the gospel, free agency, would be ended. No man would have to live by faith.
"If joy and peace and rewards were instantaneously given the doer of good, there could be no evil—all would do good but not because of the rightness of doing good. There would be no test of strength, no development of character, no growth of powers, no free agency, only satanic controls.
"Should all prayers be immediately answered according to our selfish desires and our limited understanding, then there would be little or no suffering, sorrow, disappointment, or even death, and if these were not, there would also be no joy, success, resurrection, nor eternal life and godhood."

There's a great deal of wisdom there! The Apostle Paul who was also well acquainted with trials taught: "For all things are for your sakes, that the abundant grace might through the thanksgiving of many redound to the glory of God.
"For which cause we faint not; but though our outward man perish, yet the inward man is renewed day by day.

"For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, worth for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory;
"While we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen: for the things which are seen are temporal; but the things which are not seen are eternal." (KJV 2 Corinthians 4:15–18).

It helps to remember, during times of stress, that trials don't last forever, even when it may seem like it.
When I complained to my older brother about my old house blues, he reminded me that we all have troubles that are a part of life for us to learn from. He compared it to river rafting: sometimes the water is calm and smooth, and sometimes there are rough water and rapids. When we come to the rapids, it helps to know that the calm water is just around the bend.

Rafting on the Salmon River. Notice the rapids!

This particular rapid felt like a class 5, but it reality it was probably more like a class 3 rapid. The trick is to hang on and ride it out! (I can say that now that the crisis has passed...!)
I saw this on Facebook when we were dealing with a leaking roof, a broken ceiling, and the insurance company that was far less than wonderful to deal with:

Don't forget that you're human.It's okay to have a melt down.

Just don't unpack and live there.

Cry it out and then refocus on where you are headed.

And this gem, also found on Facebook that same week, helped keep it all in perspective:

Life is Amazing   and then it's awful.  

And then it's amazing again. 

And in between the amazing and the awful, It's ordinary and mundane and routine. Breath in the amazing 

Hold on through the awful and 

Relax and exhale during the ordinary. 

That's just living. Heart breaking, soul-healing, amazing, ordinary life.

And so it is! Finally, after 4 months of looking at a hole in my ceiling, the leak in the roof is finally fixed (it only took 5 tries, including 3 from a roofing contractor). And soon I will have a new ceiling and refinished wood floor. Cannot wait! :)

The lovely hole in my ceiling, soon to be just a memory

Life is looking better!

Reflections on 2019

It's been just over a year since retirement, and 2019 has been filled with adjustments, new experiences and unexpected twists and turns.
One of the highlights as well as a challenge was the change in using my time well. I had assumed that when I retired I would have unlimited time to do the things I had always wanted to do: clean and organize the house, travel, write, spend time with family, do some crafts, etc. To my surprise, I found that I didn't necessarily have all the time to do what I wanted immediately, and it is even easier to procrastinate (and get caught up in the television) than when I was on a work schedule.
I learned a couple of things: Make a list of goals to be accomplished during the week, and work on them a little at a time. I've discovered that I don't need to beat myself up if I have a less-than-efficient day (or week, or month). The important thing is to make progress, however slowly it may be.
For example: I thought I could deep clean and organize my house within six months; ha! It's still in the works, but I can see progress. And that's important: enjoy the process and the results.
Another thing I have discovered: balance the time with a variety of activities and projects, both physical and mental. I'm still working on figuring how to do that one...
One of the things that have kept me busy is writing a few blog posts for Familysearch (https://www.familysearch.org/blog/en/)  I was also given my grandfather's LDS mission journal from 1912 that cover his first six months as a missionary. I'm in the process of transcribing it; both writing projects have been fascinating! And I'm looking forward to doing more writing and working on family history.

Granddad's Mission Journal, 1912

A.J. Winters, California Mission 1912

David and I have found that we enjoy being with each other, but sometimes we need to do our own thing, so we put together my home office and slowly organized the garage to give us space for our own activities and interests.

Before (embarrassing, but accurate)

After dejunking!

We have also discovered that we enjoy running errands and taking breaks whenever the mood strikes. Sometimes we plan out a "date day" and sometimes we do things on the spur of the moment; it's so nice to be in charge of our schedules...

Date Day_Road to Manti, Utah

Crystal Hot Springs, Ut

One of the best things we did was to invest in a brand-new camper and put it to good use. We delight in being able to come and go as the mood strikes. And road trips have turned out to be a great thing for David emotionally and mentally. We took an inaugural trip to the San Rafael Swell in April, to Idaho and southern Montana in May, fishing trips to Strawberry Reservoir and Moon Lake in June, Idaho again in July, Current Creek in August, and the Grand Canyon and central Arizona in October. We look forward to taking many more such road trips!


New Camper_San Rafael Swell 2019

Some scenes from our travels:

San Rafael Swell Overlook, April 2019

Golden Spike celebration, May 2019

North Fork Salmon River 2019

Bannack, Montana May 2019

Moon Lake, Utah, June 2019

Moon Lake

North Rim, Grand Canyon, October 2019

Current Creek mountains, Utah, August 2019

Strawberry Reservoir, June 2019

Salmon River sunset, July 2019

Current Creek, August 2019

Payette River, Idaho, July 2019

Update on David: He's been holding steady, in spite of health and house issues that popped up this fall. He was admirably patient, calm, and supportive. I still worry about him watching so much television, but I appreciate his efforts and am learning to let him progress at his own pace and in his own way.


David_Moon Lake Utah

Update on the family: The family continues to grow and progress. We delight in and are so proud of each family member. After two years as a single mother, our youngest daughter, Katie, remarried. We are happy to welcome her new husband, Andy, into the family!
Soldier Brian is now Major Brian! We are so proud of him and his hard work!


Katie and Andy

What will 2020 bring? Who knows? But I'm sure there will be new experiences, and twists and turns. I have several projects around the house and with family history to work on, and I'm looking forward to a new year and decade!

Arizona Road Trip, 2019